moon memories

when the past leaks into the present

I. 

i remember hillel garden snow piles 

and craving you in my bed as i tossed and turned 

my mind contorted by candy land visions 

my lips moving silently for you 

they mouthed your name 

where are you, shrieking from the center of me 

II. 

we moved in stages 

first your legs across my legs 

and then our hips followed 

mouthing 

`hey, what i have been choking down all day is 

i love you, i really think i am falling in love with you` 

falling // deeper  

into the well outside the music hall 

we used to meet at and it became a symbol 

a something 

a place we fought and touched each other 

so many stones 

so many memories held in places held in rocks held in dirt 

III. 

i give myself to the moon 

i remember and i weep 

and i give myself to the moon 

because four walls 

can contain 

the patterns of the mind 

but the wild world 

takes them and gives me 

spacious moment wonder

i root the ruts of my past 

to find the hidden pearl gem

i see when i look into the depths 

of the terror in me 

of the terror in me 

………

i have something to say, 

i have something to say 

i remember seeing you 

i remember seeing you in a dream somewhere 

in a dream somewhere 

i remember seeing you 

when the past leaks into the present

*******